Caught by the bird

Since childhood, we have always been advised by our parents and elders to rise early in order to gear up for the challenges and activities that are lined up for the rest of the day. Obviously the proverb used for this piece of advice is ''The early bird catches the worm''.

The proverb can also be rephrased as an anti-proverb : ''The early worm gets caught by the bird''.

Whether we accept the proverb or the anti-proverb depends on whether we visualize ourselves as the bird or the worm. If we visualize ourselves as a bird, then the interpretation is quite obvious. On the other hand if we visualize ourselves as the worm and go by the anti-proverb, it makes us feel quite lazy and insecure; as if we are not really prepared for confronting our adversaries. But that really doesn't mean one has to feel weak or inferior in visualizing oneself as a worm and stay hidden in a cocoon. The motivation of the early worm to rise early is to avoid getting caught by the bird. That is because if the worm wakes up late, it can't prevent the inevitable from happening- it will eventually end up getting caught by the bird . Another cardinal sin for the worm is to assume that the bird will also not rise early- this is a sure shot recipe for disaster.

A very common example to elucidate this bird and worm syndrome is our college life. Obviously the worm refers to the students and the bird (eagle to be precise) refers to the professors. This proverbial bird always has the habit of rising early to conduct lectures and the proverbial worm always has the habit of doing exactly the opposite and consequently ends up missing the lectures. Hence, it faces severe reprimands and threats like not being eligible for semester exams and placements due to attendance shortage, term not granted etc. The end results are catastrophic. So its always better (though difficult) to wake up early. In that event the early worm will not get caught by the bird. This will negate not only the proverb but also the anti-proverb.

Inside a glass house

I remember Harsha Bhogle saying this in one of his TV interviews, ‘’A tired mind is a bad mind.’’ Now, how does the mind become tired? This is because we think in a very complex manner. With manifold goals to achieve, and in a frenetic endeavour to come out with the best possible solution, we forget the simple facts and always think in a complicated manner resulting in ‘’Chemical Lochas’’ in our brain. It has become a general perception that coming out with complex solutions would result in a quantum leap and enable us to reach the zenith. Hence instead of looking from a grassroots level and attacking the crux of the matter, the labyrinthine thoughts entangle the internal wiring in our minds, resulting in a short circuit. A holistic and a simplistic viewpoint, would prevent such a catastrophe and hence is the perfect antidote for the tired mind.

In a very generic manner, this simple proverb explains how the kaleidoscopic mind forms a perception of things- ‘’People living in glass houses should not throw stones.’’ We know that if we live in glass houses and throw stones, the repercussions will be hazardous. This is the general view. An MBA aspirant after cramming pages of exhaustive word lists, in a desperate attempt to bell the CAT would complicate and rephrase the proverb as ‘’People living in vitreous edifices should abstain from hurling perilous projectiles’’, thereby showing off a glimpse of his flamboyant vocabulary (no offence intended though). His general notion is that having a rich vocabulary comprised of bombastic words at his disposal is a passport to success, without realising the fact that it has transformed him into nothing but a walking-talking lexicon.

In fact, there is an even more simple manner of completing the proverb which begins with ‘’People living in glass houses’’. Why unnecessarily complicate matters by throwing stones and breaking glass thereby resulting in a mess? The human mind is concealed inside a fragile glass house and should be prevented from getting shattered by the ‘stones’ of complexities. Hence, what is the first and foremost thing we should do when we live inside a glass house? It’s fairly simple- we should undress in the dark. Therefore, ‘’People living in glass houses should undress in the dark...!!!’’ Stay simple- projectiles will take care of themselves :)

All about cats and pigeons

''Cat among the pigeons'' is one of the most commonly used idioms in the English language. It means ''if something or someone puts, or sets or lets, the cat among the pigeons, they create a disturbance and cause trouble.'' Though the Cat and the Mouse have been inextricable entities since time immemorial, we never say ''Cat among the mice.'' Somehow the pigeon finds its way in, though the cat never really has had a predilection for pigeons, except for an occasional deviation in its otherwise regular platter. Let us examine why.

Pigeons are generally associated with qualities like calmness, tranquility, quietude etc. Hence, if a cat is let loose amidst a flock of pigeons, it is sure to cause pandemonium. The ominous presence of a cat is enough to trigger panic in the flock. Suddenly the flock finds themselves at sixes and sevens and start fluttering their wings in a desperate endeavor to escape. Even though the cat if let loose amidst a horde of mice, causes frantic chaos and confusion, the impact felt is much lesser in comparison to the former situation, because except for a few squeaks and screeches, nothing else really happens with the mice. Somehow the mice scamper their way to escape. Whereas the noise caused due fluttering of the wings of the pigeons is sufficient to distract our attention. The frenzied pattern of flight which the pigeons follow en-route to escape is an indication of mayhem . Hence we say ''Cat among the pigeons'' and not ''Cat among mice'' purely because of the impact factor.

Nevertheless, this idiom is used across multifarious situations. Let us see a few of them:- When a bad tempered bully of manager starts hurling vitriolic abuses on his team comprised of dedicated and meticulous workers,and threatens to fire them, we can visualize a cat among the pigeons situation. Again, in cricket we often find commentators saying, '' the fast bowler is in the midst of a hostile and fiery spell. One more wicket here will expose the tail-enders and set the cat among the pigeons.'' (For MBA aspirants, the server crashes and intermittent technical glitches in CAT 2009 also set the cat among the pigeons). Even Agatha Christie, the Queen of Crime has written a Hercule Poirot thriller titled ''Cat among the pigeons.'' Thus we find the manifold usage of the idiom.

Now let us think of ''Pigeon among the cats'' scenario.An Engineering student when bombarded with stupefying questions from panels of hostile professors in viva examinations is sure to have experienced this.(Although I have had the unique privilege of being the ''pigeon among lions'' :) .

Can we imagine a situation where a pigeon set among cats is capable of wreaking havoc?Apparently,the answer seems to be an absolute no-brainer. But if we can think a little out-of-the-box, then the answer is probably a big yes. That pigeon is none other than one of the world's greatest fast bowlers- Glenn McGrath (nicknamed The Pigeon). By dint of his pace and excellent swing control, he was capable of getting even the best of the batsmen out. The mere sight of the pigeon steaming in from 30 yards was enough to set the batsman's heart pounding in fear. The players in the dressing room, by then would have no more nails left to bite. At the same time, there also exists a compassionate,sympathetic and a humanitarian side of this apparently aggressive pigeon. Off the field he is perhaps one of the most amiable cricketers ever seen. After the unfortunate demise of his wife, he has taken a noble initiative of setting up the McGrath Foundation which raises money for cancer treatment and spreading cancer awareness. No words can describe the greatness of this pigeon.

Similarly,the human mind is also like an imperceptible pigeon- calm, unruffled, imperturbable from the outside,but yet at the same time, has enough power and potential inside even to challenge the best, and emerge triumphant.Hence, it all depends on how we unleash the pigeon in us, which determines whether we fly to great heights or eventually end up getting killed by the cat.

Fifteen minute reminders

Over the century, Indian cinema by virtue of its myriad hues has enthralled countless audiences all around the globe. Gradually cinema has become an intrinsic part of our life, not only for the entertainment aspect which it has provided us with, but also for the morals and lessons which it has taught us. The timeless romantic classics have made many a heart go on an emotional roller-coaster ride. The action and thriller flicks (though some of them are inspired from Hollywood) have made audiences sit on the edge of the seats, sending them on a wild goose chase. The rib-tickling comedies have ensured laugh riots across innumerable houseful theaters. With item-numbers making a foray and almost replacing the traditional dance sequences, the titillation quotient has also been maintained, in addition to providing jobs to erstwhile jobless Censor board members. We cant simply imagine life without cinema.

But a new genre of Indian cinema has emerged and gained a lot of popularity recently amongst the audience - a theme based on rare diseases which plagues the human mind and body (I am not sure of the exact nomenclature of this genre of films). These movies have not only made us aware about the rare ailments,but also have provided us with glimpses of the hardships and misfortunes these unfortunate people have to go through. Their fighting spirit despite all odds, inspires us more and more. The portrayal of the dyslexic child in ''Taare Zameen Par'' has made tears roll down the cheeks of many . The movie ''Paa'' on the other hand provides a deep insight into Progeria,a rare ailment where the affected person ages faster.''My Name is Khan'' deals with Aspergers Syndrome where a person has difficulties in socializing whereas Karthik calling Karthik depicts a Schizophrenic person who suffers from split personality and keeps calling himself (by setting pre-recordes messages on the phone). Amir Khan plays an amnesiac in Ghajini, forgetting facts after every fifteen minutes.

Lets have a lighter perspective on this :- The modern generation has a plethora of activities and deadlines to meet. The demands are soaring higher than the Kolkata taxi meter and have transformed the world into a wild rat-race, where a fraction of a second clearly demarcates a winner from a loser. Halcyon days have become a rarity. Hence, it is quite imperative that to achieve all our goals, we need to prioritize our activities to ensure the ideal cornucopia for our ever rising demands. One of the ways of doing this is by setting reminders to ourselves at frequent intervals, to ensure that we do not forget our activities. To cut a long story short, our life has somewhat become an amalgamation of the two symptoms portrayed in Karthik calling Karthik and Ghajini, where we need to keep reminding ourselves every now and then, what to do and what not to. Let us have an insight into what pre-recorded messages our Indian celebrities might have for themselves, after every fifteen minutes (if not lesser i.e) :-

SALMAN KHAN - "Its time I take off my shirt''

MALLIKA SHERAWAT- '' Its time I wear some clothes''

SHAHRUKH KHAN- ''My name is Khan and I am not a terrorist''

(Ah..!!! Now we know why he said that so many times in the movie)

HRITHIK ROSHAN- Time to fly some ''Kites''

BELEAGUERED INDIAN CRICKETERS (after the humiliating World T20 debacle)-

''When and where is the next late night booze party??''

PRANAB MUKHERJEE- ''Pheeskaal dephiseet eezz less than thaaa GDP''

(Only God knows how many times he's said that)

DHARMENDRA- '' Where are the dogs? I am thirsty "

(Kutte kameene main tera khoon pee jaoonga)

And finally, last but not the least, a reminder message to myself :-

''Stop wasting time by writing such nonsenscial blogs...!!!!'' :)

Writing on the wall

Here you can see one of the weirdest graffitis which I have ever seen in my life. The writing on the wall, beside the serene and picturesque banks of the river Ganges in Rishikesh goes like this:-

''HOLY GANGA

NO BIKINI

NO SMOKING''

(An inverted Swastika has also been etched adjacent to it).

As we were enjoying the cruise along the placid river, basking in the warmth of the sun, spellbound by the beauty of the river and the surrounding mountains, this graffiti suddenly caught the attention of one of my friends,who couldn't help himself from clicking this photograph. This graffiti suddenly came out of nowhere and it seemed like the proverbial rabbit out of the hat. But nevertheless it ensured that all of us had a hearty laugh, It soon became one of the most viewed photographs, worthy enough of providing embellishment even to Orkut and Facebook albums.

But this euphemistic writing on the wall poses a grave issue in front of us. Since time immemorial, the mighty Ganges has been at the heart of the Indian civilisation. By virtue of its might, it has carved a niche for itself by providing an identity to Indians. But how has it been repaid for all that it has offered? Year after year it has been the dump-yard of tons of sewage,chemicals and innumerable obnoxious toxins and pollutants. The result has been the gradual killing of India's most treasured natural resources. Crores of rupees pumped in by the Government, amidst a lot of fanfare has resulted in nothing but failure, as the river continues to suffer even more than before. Amidst lost hopes, this graffiti is perhaps a desperate attempt by the locals of Rishikesh to avoid further embarrassment and disrespect to the Ganga by reminding people atleast not to bathe in its waters wearing bikinis. Their apprehension is that this would certainly be the final nail in the coffin and put an end to the epic journey of this magnificent river. The inverted Swastika ,in its own hidden manner also probably signifies the sorry state of affairs. Hence it is all in our hands to invert the Swastika and remove forever this stark writing on the wall.

The power of thirteen

Two of the all-time greatest books which have captivated my imagination are ''Six Thinking Hats'' by Edward de Bono and ''Seven habits of highly effective people'' by Stephen R.Covey. These two icons are probably the greatest modern thinkers the world has ever seen. The thought-provoking morals ensconced magnificently in their principles provides the ideal wisdom for people who want to take control of their lives,business and careers. These principles not only help you to know yourself better, but it also changes how you envisage the world around you. The six-course and seven-course meal provided by de Bono and Covey respectively cultivates inner thoughts in such a manner that it results in an outward behavior more than sufficient to win the world.

But have we ever wondered how we can combine the power of the hats and the habits together leading to further improvement of our lives, thereby ensuring the everlasting process of Kai-zen. Six and seven always adds upto 13, which is considered as an unlucky number. But we shall not view 13 as unlucky, since the habits and hats have already changed our perspective by creating paradigm shifts in our vision. So, we shall now elucidate how can we change 13 into a lucky number by combining 6 and 7.

Dr Covey's Habit-1 says, ''Be Proactive'' instead of being reactive. Increase the time between the stimulus and your response, whereby, when confronted with a situation you can ensure that you use your entire thought process and think of different permutations and combinations before arriving at a decision. Whereas de Bono's Red Thinking Hat signifies ''Emotions and Feelings''. We shall take up the example of the captain of the warship as illustrated by Dr Covey, to analyze this situation:-

The captain of a warship sighted an obstacle(which he mistook to be another warship) midway in the sea and then instructed the signalman to change the obstacle's direction by 20 degrees. But the signalman refused. The captain replied, ''I am the captain, obey my order.'' The signalman again refused. This continued again and again until the captain chastised him severely. The signalman finally replied ''This obstacle is a lighthouse.'' The captain realized his clanger of being reactive in his instructions. Had he been proactive, he would have envisioned the possibility that the obstacle might have been a lighthouse. He could have handled the situation more efficiently and have avoided the discomfiture, had he put on his red thinking hat at the same time while being proactive. This would have removed him from all the egoistic emotions and feelings of being the captain of a warship. His ego could not simply accept the fact that an ordinary signalman can disobey the order of a Captain. This led to reduction in his proactivity and the consequent embarassment. Thus, we see how the combination of hats and habits can lead to more effective solutions to problems. After all, its all about hats, habits and the power of 13...!!!!!!

Jhooth bole kauwa kaate

I am sure everyone has heard this small adage in Hindi "Jhooth Bole Kauwa Kaate, Kaale kauwe se dariyo." The following anecdote reminds me of this.

This incident happened during our 5th semester mid-term examination. The paper was one of the most boring and descriptive subjects in our entire course '' Industrial Management''. There was no concrete syllabus for this vague subject since it required you to pen down your own fundas and ideas pertaining to problems faced in the industry. The evaluation criteria was more the pages you write, higher you score. On the night before the exam, we were casually browsing through the internet reading articles on Industrial Management. The intensity of preparation was not too great as there were lesser credits for this subject and moreover it was a mid-term examination, which was equivalent to a warmup match before the final semester exams. One of my friends prepared for the examination by watching the Bipasha Basu movie "Corporate" to garner some management principles adopted by the dusky Bong beauty in the corporate world. (What an idea Sir ji......!!!!!!)

The next morning we went to the exam hall, inspired by Corporate. The questions were fairly straightforward and I had done with almost all of them, but was breaking my head in search of more points for this particular question "Why is IT Industry developing rapidly in Kolkata?'' I had written the usual points like technical skills of people, high demand, availability of SEZ's etc. But the 20 mark question certainly required a few more points and I was running short of them. My neighbour in the exam hall was Mr Crow. (A baseless allegation of crow meat being served instead of chicken in his hostel, led to this bizarre nomenclature). I consulted him for a few more points, but since he was busy writing, he immediately handed over to me the loose sheet on which he had written the answer, and asked me to copy from it. I had never been involved in exchanging answer scripts in any examination before. Tension gripped me. But somehow I managed to regain my composure and decided to go ahead. (I would advise all readers to refrain from such nefarious activities). The very first point which he had written in bold letters went like this :-

''KOLKATA HAS A VERY WELL ESTABLISHED PORT WHICH FACILITATES EASY IMPORT-EXPORT OF SOFTWARE. HENCE IT INDUSTRY IS DEVELOPING IN KOLKATA.''

I was stunned on reading this and was lost for words to express my bewilderment. I was suddenly reminded of our poor Indian batsmen down under, facing chin music and bouncers from Brett Lee on a lightning fast Perth wicket. I simply had no courage and energy to read further points, as I was clean bowled by the first one itself. Somehow,escaping the invigilator's eyes, I managed to return the sheet back to Crow and finally submitted the paper to avoid any suspicions. Software coming and going in ships was something bizarre and unheard of. We all had a hearty laugh at the cost of Crow's ignorance.

A few months later, the placement season began with top notch IT firms like Cognizant,IBM,Wipro first on the list, offering hefty paycheques. Crow always desired for a white collar job in the IT Industry and was spending endless nights cramming C, C++ programs in a desperate attempt to fulfill his desire. I wondered, how someone who still had the idea that Software is exported in ships would make a career for himself in the IT Industry. I never wanted to deter him, and at the same time I didnt want that he should work in an industry, which was simply not his cup of tea. Doing a job which he doesnt like would enervate him and ruin all happiness in future. Foreseeing this dreaded day, I decided to convince Crow to do what he loved doing, what he was really passionate about, which was Machine Design. I explained that since he himself was a crow, once he would leave his nest in search of greener pastures, the cuckoo lurking behind the branches would destroy his nest and ruin his party. After pensive contemplation, Crow decided to throw away the software books, and started off with Machine design, high on confidence. His hardwork and dedication really paid off as he landed up with a job in a top notch design firm.

Follow what your heart tells you to do. (Remember Amir Khan's dialogue in 3 Idiots about Lata Mangeshkar playing cricket and Tendulkar singing songs). Do what you love, love what you do. Wohi kar jisme tera talent hai. Doing something which you dont like may result in temporary happiness, but it will always act like the force of gravity, trying to pull you downwards, and will spread like weeds and get entangled with your happiness. The results may be catastrophic. So do not lie to express your satiety by saying that you love doing this even if you don't, because once you do that, the illusory crow, always hovering above your head, is ever ready to strike...!!!!!!!!

Can you rotate this machine?

This incident happened a few years back during our 6th semester Engineering examinations. The subject was Electrical Machines-III. This was considered as the toughest amongst all the subjects in our four year engineering course. Securing pass marks, that too in the very first attempt was considered as a remarkable achievement. Even a mark above 40 was considered as an icing on the cake, considering the level of difficulty of the questions encountered,which was more than enough to rotate our heads in synchronous speed like any other machine. The stringency of correction never seemed to help the cause and the professors, known for their notoriety had no qualms in flunking a student by even a mark. Clearing the exam in the second attempt was also no walk in the park.

On the night before the exams, all of us were cramming our heads, frantically memorizing unfathomable formulae and bizarre diagrams to avoid the humiliation of appearing for a supplementary examination. A few of us were offering humble prayers to the Almighty to help us clear this obstacle. Pandemonium reigned all around. Some students tried to relax themselves by having an occasional drink, while others turned their lungs into chimneys courtesy of the deadly cancer stick. So amidst this bedlam arrived our hero Mr VS (I would refrain from expanding the abbreviation). He was cool enough to note down the syllabus from me just the previous evening and was about to start his preparations that night only, unaware of the mayhem that lay ahead of him the very next morning. He was fortunate or rather unfortunate enough to sit in a room occupied by 2 students who were busy making chits since evening. That somehow upset my dear friend, and he was searching here and there for someone who could explain him the concept behind the rotation of a machine, but alas! he could'nt find a single soul and cherfully he dozed off. (I remember having handed him a few notes and drawings that evening and asked him to go through them to ensure that he somehow scrapes through). His carefree attitude towards the uphill battle that lay in front of him, raised a few doubts in my mind that he might have been blessed by the Almighty with some divine power to pass the exam. I wondered that, had Constantino Brumidi been alive, this would have inspired him to draw another fresco titled "The Apotheosis of VS".

The next morning the dreaded day came. After 3 hours of racing against time, I was confident of just about scraping through, whereas some were very depressed and were sure of a retest. A small contingent was spotted near the canteen who were in mixed emotions. From them I came to know that our hero Mr VS had bunked the exam..!!!! This was like a shock to me. I was simply stunned and had no words to express my bewilderment. In a flabbergasted state, I somehow mustered courage to take the phone out from my pocket, and call up dear VS. He answered and said," Harish, I am busy giving tuition classes, I shall get back to you in an hour. My student has a major examination tomorrow." My head started reeling on hearing this. Then he called up and said calmly, " Harish, I somehow didnt like the idea of my roommates preparing chits, who also encouraged me to do so, and I thought that flunking was a better option than copying from chits and passing. I accept my mistake of not studying for this exam and I shall surely clear the retest on my own merit."

This incident shows the integrity and honesty of VS. These are indispensable qualities which all of us must possess and never let go of irrespective of any situation. Whenever I see people copying in any exam, I am reminded of good old VS. Then I thought, really this VS means "VERY SPECIAL." Today he is one of my best buddies. I failed in rotating this machine in VS, but then realised an important fact, "A Transformer is also a type of a machine which does’nt rotate. Life itself is a machine and it must rotate in the right direction."